Before and After

Before Children, or when you have only one, and you get sick, you whimper and moan and wake up your husband in the middle of the night so he can try to comfort you.

When you have multiple children, you swallow your whimpers so that at least one of you can be rested tomorrow to take care of the kids.

Before children (or when you have only one),  you lie on the couch and watch movies and sleep, and when your stomach decides it no longer cares to have matter in it, you do your business in the bathroom and then clean up and go back to the couch, moaning at the tears streaming down your face.

After children, you care for the baby, who is also not feeling good, right up to the moment when you can’t put off the trip to the bathroom, at which point you drop him on the floor and ignore his heartbroken sobs while you empty your insides. When you’re done, you return to changing his diaper.

Before children (or when you have one), you do only what you absolutely have to with the child: i.e. nurse. Daddy does diapering, dishes, and dirty laundry.

When you have more than one, you run laundry, fix lunch, rinse dishes (holding your breath so the smell of food doesn’t make you hurl again), read books and change diapers, pump the milk the baby is too sick to eat himself, and only when you know you simply can’t do it anymore, do you call your husband at work and say, “Honey…please come home.” At which point he makes dinner, argues the kids through the meal by himself, and deals with the older two so all you have is the one who can’t accept a substitute for Mommy.

(Incidentally, most of the above applies to the husband, too. Moms don’t have a monopoly on martyrdom. 😉 )

I always wondered how it worked when the parent gets sick. I don’t remember my parents getting sick like this until I as old enough to take care of myself. Now I know.

Now the next question is, what happens when both parents are sick at once?

(Hint: God, can you just leave me in the dark on that one?)