More things I don’t understand


I don’t understand why, if the whole floor is clean except for one book, Alex has to step on it.

I don’t understand the wanton destruction wreaked by three children on a play date. Mess is one thing, but to simply run around and sweep everything off the shelves, dump every single item out of its container, not to play with it, but just to dump it?

I don’t understand how the shoes with the $200 inserts, that Julianna was wearing at 11:30a.m., can vanish from the face of the earth by the end of nap.

I don’t understand how Alex can be the loudest thing on the block, and still think any time the music starts at church, or someone is scolding him, he covers his ears because it’s “too loud.”

I don’t understand how Alex thinks that when Nicholas is crying, getting two inches from his face and shouting as loudly as he possibly can is going to make him feel better. (See above.)

I don’t understand how it can take him an hour (literally) to put on his underwear in the morning, and yet he can run upstairs, change into his entire Superman ensemble, and be back downstairs in thirty seconds (also literally).

I don’t understand why every establishment thinks they have to play REALLY LOUD music—or music at all, frankly. It’s not like anybody’s listening to it. And the kids are already screaming; why make them scream louder to be heard over top of REALLY LOUD MUSIC?

I don’t understand how a baby who sleeps through screaming, shouting, complaining, and being pummeled in his bouncy during the day gets overstimulated at 8p.m. and can’t get to sleep for an hour (or more).

I don’t understand how, even though frequently they make me so frantic I can hardly breathe, I love them so much.

Some things will forever remain a mystery.


(p.s. The shoes were buried underneath the cloth diapers in the drawer. Sneaky, huh?)

5 thoughts on “More things I don’t understand

  1. As a matter of fact… 🙂 You and I made the mistake of not checking on the swath of destruction before we let them separate for the day. And I’m quite sure that Alex had at least as much to do with it as your two did, so don’t feel responsible.

  2. Andrea W.

    How in the world did you find shoes buried under a stack of cloth diapers? (Did J. put them there?) And do you rent out your “finding” services? I have some library items that have disappeared from the face of the earth…

  3. hehehehe

    This is not a short story.

    You see, she threw the diapers on the floor and the shoes in the drawer, and when I came in to clean up, I threw the diapers back in the drawer (“stack” is a gracious term, BTW), and accidentally buried the shoes. So when I called the babysitter to ask if she remembered seeing the shoes anywhere, she said she’d seen them on the bedroom floor. That was when I remembered that Julianna had been in the drawer, and it occurred to me to check under the diapers.

    There you have it. Don’t count on me to find anything; I need TONS of help!!!

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