Things That Go Shatter, Crash and Snap (a 7QT post)


The day after Christmas, we were at my parents’ house, and I asked Alex to help me spread the tablecloth. My mistake was putting him at the end by the Christmas tree, but I could swear he didn’t touch it at all; that little glass ornament of the Wise Men simply shattered in midair from the resonance of his personality alone. (Well, a mom can dream, can’t she?)


Santa Snow globe

The morning after we came home from my in-laws’ house, everyone was occupying themselves quietly when the most almighty thump-thump-thump-CRASH made its way down the (carpeted) stairs. Two parents came rushing to the scene and found Julianna sitting guiltily at the top of the stairs while the wet, glitter-encrusted, sharp-edged wreckage of Nicholas’ brand-new music box/Santa snow globe lay scattered over the bottom seven (carpeted) stairs. (Did I mention they’re CARPETED stairs?)

This was a particularly tragic loss because: 1) Nicholas is THREE, 2) he fell in love with the snow globes one day at Target while I was perusing alarm clocks, and 3) he’d been reading The Secret of Santa’s Island, which ends with a charming snow globe. You know how every once in a while you stumble on a gift that is absolutely perfect? This was one of those. And a quick search of the Web made it clear that this snow globe could not be bought for love or money again. Fortunately, a Facebook diatribe ended with a friend who has a large collection of musical snow globes offering to choose one from her collection and send it to Nicholas.


The day after we came home from my in-laws’, we put Julianna and Nicholas down for nap in our bed. I won’t bore you with the drawn-out explanation for why that particular configuration; just know it was necessary. An hour later, Nicholas emerged from the room. “Daddy, Juweeanna’s gwasses bwoke,” he said.

Earpiece: SNAP.


The evening of that same day, I was reading The Book of Three to Alex when from the far side of the bed came a CRASH, immediately followed by Michael’s most sustained, ear-piercing wail. We found him underneath my jewelry armoire, which had every single drawer open, and following the boom, no jewelry in it at all. As we spent ten minutes sorting out the mess, we discovered the pieces of a bracelet my mother-in-law gave me two years ago. By pieces I mean three, plus  two of the stones popped out of their brackets.


Why yes, I’m tremendously glad my kids are GOING BACK TO SCHOOL, thanks for asking.


Only Julianna’s not going today, because she woke up at 4:30 with a fever and respiratory distress bad enough to scare her into crying about it. I’m not enormously concerned, but on the way home from my in-laws’ house, Alex had croup bad enough that he physically couldn’t draw breath, and Julianna, of course, has a history of much worse. Still, she hasn’t had hospital-worthy croup since the fall of 2009, so I’m hopeful we’ll ride this one out as we’ve ridden out the others.


And that is why I’m finishing this post at 5:16 a.m. instead of still in bed. And now I leave you to go to Jazzercise so I can get back home before Christian has to leave for work.