
Item 1: Michael
Michael and I went to the park. He ran right for the 7-foot chunky tire sunk in the ground, where he was greeted by another little boy shooting spider webs at him, including appropriate sound effects. (Think “p-chew! p-chew!”)
Recognizing a kindred spirit, Michael’s eyes lit up. He held up his hands and started Iron-Man blasting his new friend, also with sound effects. (“Fwoh! Fwoh!”)
Item 2: Alex
Alex, in the car, says, “You know, this isn’t a criticism, but the Disney people really don’t know much about Star Wars.”
“Oh?” says I. “Why do you say that?”
“Well, in that Star Wars ride at Disney world, (classmate) said sometimes it’s Darth Vader who stops you, and sometimes it’s Darth Maul.”
“Yeah…” I’m not getting the problem.
“But you’re always starting at a rebel base,” he says patiently. “So it can only be Darth Vader. See?”
Point taken, Alex. Point taken.

Item 3: Nicholas
Nicholas carpooled home from baseball last night with a friend of the family. When she brought him to the door, she said, “We brought the snacks tonight, and Nicholas told us, ‘These aren’t very healthy. You need to do better next time. MY Mom says SHE is going to bring HEALTHY snacks when it’s her turn.”
Face palm. And proof that you just never know what your kids are going to latch onto in what you say and turn it into a REALLY EMBARRASSING MOMENT.