I’ve heard people say that wallpapering is a test of a marriage. I think they should try critiquing each other’s creative work. Christian has always been my earliest set of eyes on a piece of music, and unlike most people, he’s never felt inhibited about telling me exactly what’s wrong with it. In the early…
Read MoreAll articles filed in marriage
Stupid Things We Fight About
In honor of our anniversary coming up this weekend, I thought I’d take a look at how far we’ve come. One Saturday morning, when we had been married for about six months (maybe less), I decided I was going to get up and make breakfast. I figured the noise would wake Christian up and he…
Read MoreTrust Fall
Marriage is such a trust fall. An eyes-closed, over-the-cliff leap into the unknown. You’re offering your heart, your body, your whole soul to someone else. You’re placing everything you are in someone else’s hands, with absolutely no guarantee that they will take care of it. And they’re doing the same thing with you. Trusting you…
Read MoreThe Power Of Laughter
Last night, while I was singing at church, my husband caught my eye from the pew where he was sitting and cracked a silent joke. Without ever saying a word, with nothing more than a look and a simple gesture, he made me laugh. I really love being married to someone who can make me laugh.…
Read MoreWhat A Weekend Away Does For A Marriage
We went to the Adirondacks this weekend—just the two of us. We knew it would be a good thing to take some concentrated time as a couple, but getting the bases covered was quite the logistical production. By the time we left I was not so much excited as I was just hoping and praying…
Read MorePreparing For A Weekend Away
We’re preparing for a weekend away in this house—a weekend without the kids. I’m really excited about it. And also anxious, apparently: I spent last night having nightmares about all the things that might happen to my children while both of us are gone. The last one involved Nazis, so that at least helped me recognize…
Read MoreOrdinary Love
I am hopeless romantic at heart–a sucker for a great kiss in a movie or a book, hopelessly sentimental about stories where new love is found alongside other adventures. But I’m also becoming ever more aware of how easy it is to take an oversimplified, overdramatized, and romanticized view of love and trying to measure…
Read MoreTrue Love Looks Like…
True love looks like deciding together not to bother with cards for Valentine’s Day, since we always forget anyway. True love looks like arguing over college funding, ten years in advance. True love looks like straightening the living room before piano students arrive. True love looks like crying in each other’s arms at the words…
Read MoreIn Which We Need Your Help, Because Prayer In Marriage is HARD.
The hardest thing about marriage, as far as I’m concerned, is praying together. My husband is deeply uncomfortable with extemporaneous vocal prayer, and over time I’ve come, not only to understand, but to agree. Praying aloud, I almost always become too self-aware, drift too close to showing off, as long as there is another person…
Read MoreIn Which Writing and Reading Makes Me Appreciate My Marriage
I’ve been outlining a new novel lately–no, outlining is too glamorous a word. I’ve been brainstorming a character and a scenario to try to make them unique and interesting enough to be marketable. At the same time, I’ve been reading a lot: epic fantasy, nonfiction, women’s fiction. Reading is different now than it once was.…
Read More
Kathleen M. Basi 