It was the day after Thanksgiving, so naturally everything should be about greed, fisticuffs and death.
Greed and fisticuffs: Christian overheard a conversation about a fight that broke out between two women over a Barbie jeep. The store personnel had to come and physically pull them off each other.
Death: A Long Island Wal Mart employee was trampled to death by the stampede of shoppers at opening time. That poor family. May God give them whatever comfort is possible in such horrible circumstances.
I wonder if Jesus cries when He sees what we have made of his birthday. Weddings, holidays—the most joyful times seem, somehow, to bring out the worst in us.
Christmas is a twelve-day season beginning on December 25th, not a 24-day season beginning the day after Thanksgiving. Whatever happened to Advent—that season of holy hush, of restrained excitement, of examining our hearts and defragmenting our scattered souls? We glamorize this time of year as a time of peace and nostalgia, but even those with the best intentions end the season worn down, stressed and disillusioned…because we are focusing in the wrong direction.
Christmas is not about kids. It’s not about money spent, or about getting (or giving) the best Stuff. It’s not even about family, though that’s a closer miss. It’s about Christ coming among us: human and divine intertwining, not as Creator and created, but as a holy union of wills that reaches its apex not in birth, but in Crucifixion and Resurrection. In salvation.
And we spend December fighting over Blue Rays and Barbie jeeps?
It’s time to reclaim Advent. We can’t withdraw from the world, but we can take the accoutrements of the season and infuse them with a deeper meaning. For years, I have struggled with how to do this. There are probably as many ways to solve the puzzle as there are families in the world; this is ours.
- Put together an Advent calendar. Ours is wooden, with compartments intended for matchbox cars and treats, but we will fill them with other activities. Opportunities for service: caroling, helping decorate the church, sorting gifts for shut-ins and poor families. In future years, I hope we’ll ring the Salvation Army bell, or volunteer at the soup kitchen. For now, with little ones, this is what we can do.
- Jesse tree. For those not familiar with this concept, here’s a link. Every day we will hang an ornament on the Jesse Tree and read a related Scripture passage. By the time Christmas comes, we will have followed the long tale of years that led to the Incarnation.
- Redefine the symbols. Our outdoor lights are a reminder to “Keep your lamps trimmed and burning,” as the song says, for we don’t know when Christ will return.
- Limit the loot. Alex will receive a couple of reasonable-sized gifts (i.e., $30-40) and a few stocking-stuffers. Julianna’s still more excited by boxes and wrapping paper than by content, so she gets a few small toys recommended by our therapists. One side of our extended family donates to a charity every year; the other makes gift boxes for each family. We fill them with things that a family can enjoy together: movie night, game night, and so on.
- Allow the pure, sweet fun. Service is important. But our Advent calendar also contains a free toy train show in St. Louis, cookie days, and even a few days with nothing to do—just a little piece of chocolate to savor. Advent is not all about doing. It’s in rest, in quiet, in stillness that God’s voice is heard the loudest.
Kathleen M. Basi 
With this beautiful post your book is off to a great start! I love the phrase “that season of holy hush,” which we so sorely lack.
I gleaned some new insights into Advent last year, as a soon-to-be bride preparing for my bridegroom (on two levels of course). I thought a lot about anticipation, preparing and waiting, which Americans do not excel at.
Still, I have a long way to go. The season strikes me as haunting and earthy and mystical, but it is a bit vague…I think most Catholics have a much better grasp on Lent and its three-fold mission. This book will be a great help!
You know, normally I would say the opposite–I would think that Christmas is so embedded, and the idea of waiting for opening presents so pervasive, that people really have a sense of Advent, but Lent is seriously misunderstood. But I see what you’re saying. The very pervasiveness of Christmas overwhelms the season of Advent–which is, of course, why I got the idea for the book in the first place.
…For those who are just joining us, my book, “Joy to the World: Advent Activities for Your Family” has been accepted by Liguori Publications, and is scheduled for release in time for Advent of 2010.